3rd quarter

New semester have come. Its 3rd semester now. More challenge to come. I need to keep on fighting, need concentration and focus more this time (though I have a partime contract job with office in about 3 months period. Hope it will not effect my study or vice versa). I'm quite worried actually. What to do, I have to!

This sem's subjects that I have took are, 1) solid and toxic waste management , 2) environmental toxicology and risk assessment , 3) land development and environment, 4) seminar and a research project need to be started already for the next semester. Huuuuu

I hope I can make through this, until the end of this semester and up to the very end of this master courses ,estimated early of next year.. I pray for myself and other too who are at the same state as me, do your best !!

Emergency

Last monday, it was early in the morning when I went out to the backyard to dry laundry ( is the term correct?) , my eyes caught into something, the tail of a phyton! It really scared me @_@.

And a few minutes after I called the Bomba, the team came, with their big truck! What an experience for me. Erkk~~

The unsolved mystery

It happened last Monday around 12 midnight. I was watching tv and suddenly i heard a weird noise came from the fish pond area. It was really strange and scary because it was loud. The sound was like a 'living things' struggle on the pebbles bed. No sound from the 'thing' only the sound of scratching and struggling that came into contact with the stones pebbles area. And there was a few times a sound of water splashing or something going into the water. I had a bad feeling on it, so I sneak a peek at the door to see it, but I saw nothing. Plus I was scared that I didn't want to see anything bad so I closed the door immediately. I rushed and just went to bed.

On the next day, I done my routine feeding the fish. I closed the water system for a while. At first, I didn't realise anything until a few hours later when saw the foods a gave didn't finish like usual. I wonder why, because it is really unusual for them behaving to not eating. Then I realised that there was only 2 fishes in the pond with a tortoise! Where are the rest?! Then only I realise the 2 fishes corpse lying on the stones pebbles bed. The big Patin fish In which have been beaten by something. And the other is the small kaloi fish. I think the rest have been eaten by the 'thing'. I wonder what the thing is. It can't be fish because the bites is big for a cat. Nor can't be a dog. Dog can't climb a fence. Then, what is it??

Hati keras

Kenapa hati ni.. Bukan baru 'declare' hati keras ke dgn dia. Lepas sms je dengan dia rasa sedih.. Tambahan pula dengan kelas english tadi yang tidak begitu memberangsangkan.. Lagi menambahkan rundum dalam hati .. Macam dicucuk- cucuk.. Yang pasti bukan dicucuk hasil daripada kelas tadi.. Tapi dia! Okay2 cukup. Fokus study. Banyak lagi nak dihadamkan! Cayok2!!

But still... Tears is dropping :(

Sangkanya indah hingga ke petang, tetapi...

It's hard to believe it. Aku terkilan, walau hati cuba dipujuk tabah. Aku terkilan aku dilayan begini.. Bukan aku x ingatkan dia, aku igtkn jgn cuba nk wat hati aku gusar dan luka..Memang x terjangka, terasa hati ni dipermainkan, atau mungkin ini satu ujian? Atau juga petunjuk yang aku pohon padaNya selama ini. Walaupun pedih semacam rasa ni, Ya Allah aku redha.. Jika menjelang tahun depan, keadaan masih sama, aku tekad, i need to move on. Face the reality. Ya Allah jika benar Engkau beri nikmat itu cuma seketika utk ku , aku redha.. Benar. Selainnya aku berserah padaMu , tetapi berikan lah aku apa yg terbaik disisiMu.

Amin

Down

Shall i just be shined and brighten like the orchid?

Type - backspace - type - backspace ... Type!

Nah... It seems everything went wrong ;(

It's a mixed up feeling... Sad , useless , unwanted, neglected..and missing someone... I know, It is wrong to say that I don't want to live anymore, but that is giving up! I shouldn't be ... 

Nauzubillah.

Dear Allah, guide me and give me strength.

Soul

Malu . resah . segan . Teruja . Sedih . Gembira .

Aku harus akur, kata-kata yang dah diluahkan tidak mampu ditarik semula. Persoalannya, apakah dia mampu manerimanya? Reaksinya pula? Adakah 2 hati ini bakal menjauh? Mungkinkah, tindakan itu terlalu drastik?
Aku terpaksa, kerana aku x terdaya lagi menanggungnya... Aku berserah dengan apa jua yg bakal berlaku...

Namun, sabar... Aku masih tidak bersedia menerima sebarang jawapan... Gugup.. Resah.. ;(

Ya Allah yang Maha Pengasih lagi Maha Penyayang, berikan aku kekuatan dalam menghadapi segala kemungkinan yang berlaku yang telah Engkau tetapkan, aku redha dan aku pasrah apa jua ketentuanMu..
Amin ya rabbal alamien.

**Terasa nk capai spek mata hitam and wear it all day long...Muka tebal....  =_=